Trisha: 0:00

Previously, on Seeds for your Marriage.

Joel Silver: 0:04

In that moment I realized that as I'm reading the word, he's looking back at me, literally the word. Every time you read the word, just realize he's looking right back at you. I'm telling you, there was one time we had 20 miles left in our gas tank. We couldn't even go to church and we had no money left. And I sat at the table. I was washing dishes in front of the window and I said, lord, are you going to provide? Half an hour later we get a phone call. How can we put funds into your account? You know what I mean. It happened over and over again. It just God provided and just over and over again. Just amazing.

Trisha: 0:49

This is the Seeds for your Marriage podcast, where we interview married couples who have overcome difficulties in their marriage and share their testimony of how they did it. We want these tips and tools to inspire and help you thrive in your marriage.

Thomas : 1:05

We are Trisha and Thomas Walker relationship coaches. We teach couples proven strategies to connect deeply and achieve God's design for an amazing marriage.

Joel Silver: 1:15

All these things that you put on yourself to go do is not what I asked you to do. So I hear this message and it brings me, pulls me back to is this what God has asked me to go do? Has he asked me to take all our money and go win the lost around the world? Has he asked me to do that? And I'm just pondering on that and then, like three days later, I hear the same testimony in a different sermon. He's done Now. I've listened to a thousand of his sermons. We fall asleep every single night to a karmic convent sermon.

Alex Silver: 1:49

Not because he's boring, just because he's got a very, just because we're feeding the word, even while we sleep. You know what?

Joel Silver: 1:53

I mean so, literally three days later wake up at two in the morning, again put on a car or a convent sermon and he gives the same exact testimony. I then said, okay, god, I'll wait on you. And when I said that, just, it was powerful, I'll wait on you, I'll wait on you. And then the household, like we had like $10 left on our account, you know what I mean, or $9. Was it $9?

Alex Silver: 2:23

That seems to be a theme with us.

Joel Silver: 2:26

But as soon as that household, we would have a huge charge of cash that we could go and do. And as soon as I came to the realization, I'll wait on you. That's when the household literally it sat on the market for six months Like 52 people came and looked at it. Nobody bought it. As soon as I said, I'll wait on you. Household.

Alex Silver: 2:51

It was just amazing and it's sold. This is kind of a little bit of a theme with us, but it's sold site unseen and the people that bought it love it. I mean, it's a beautiful house anyways but they absolutely love it. And we've had a few transactions in our history together where we've sold stuff site unseen and the recipients love it.

Joel Silver: 3:12

God's amazing.

Alex Silver: 3:13

Yeah, it's just crazy.

Joel Silver: 3:14

He'll open a door, he'll shut a door. Thank you, lord, for shutting that door. Thank you, lord for opening that door, thankful for it and everything. So that was on my heart to go travel and minister.

Alex Silver: 3:25

And that was before last year. So that story was yeah. So let's fast forward to last year, that's four years ago.

Joel Silver: 3:33

So then, but so what he put on my heart, it just wasn't for that time. He'll give you a desire, but it might not be for that time, and he'll open the doors and shut doors. Thank you Lord for opening doors and shutting doors, Thank you Lord. And so then we, finally. We get to the point where we're going to go, and we're going to go travel, and we had $30,000 for the six month trip. We knew we needed $60,000 for the for the trip, so we stepped out having half of what we needed. And as we go, Alex is like we're starting to run out of money and I made the comment I can't wait till we're down to a dollar and watch what God does. Big mistake, Because we got down to a dollar 88.

Joel Silver: 4:26

In people such as yourselves that we had only met one time began sending us money Unrequested. Just, it was like ravens bringing provision. It happened so many times on that six month trip. I'm telling you. There was one time we had 20 miles left in our gas tank. We couldn't even go to church and we had no money left. I was washing dishes in front of the window and I said, lord, are you going to provide? Half an hour later we get a phone call. How can we put funds into your account? You know what I mean. It happened over and over again. It just God provided and just over and over again. Just amazing.

Alex Silver: 5:12

And I think, for that trip last year in particular, like you know you, you lead out with excitement because you're going to be mobile and you get to see new places and meet new members of the body of Christ and participate in their services.

Alex Silver: 5:29

And then you get to meet a whole bunch of people that don't know Christ and ministers to them and you're on this like natural high, so like we're going to be mobile, we're going to do this, we're going to do that, and by the end of that trip, like well, actually the last third of that trip, we were completely immobile and we really I mean it's easy to have things fall off your lips Like I put my faith in God and I put my trust in him and I know he's my provider. Well, when you are literally down to very few resources to survive, you really understand the meaning of what it is to truly know him as your source and his provision. Because we were in an immobilized state for quite a for at least a couple of months. At the end, I mean, we couldn't even get back home. We didn't even have means to get back home. So it's perspective. Yeah.

Joel Silver: 6:23

Yeah, so, perspective, we went out with $30,000. Okay, and at one point somebody sent us $213. And that $213 could have it felt like $213,000 at the time. Do you know what I mean? Just, I mean, we got to thank God a lot. Yeah.

Joel Silver: 6:46

Yeah, for provision, yeah. But so can I tell a story about when we met you guys at the Voice of the Apostles Conference. Yeah, we got uploaded. I mean the spirit came on us hard and it was beautiful. We got I mean it was a filling up time. And when we left there, so we were jazzed out. Man, we're full, we're full.

Joel Silver: 7:12

And we went to a church down in Jacksonville, north Carolina, right outside of where Camp Lejeune is, and in that church service. And now we're not, we're not out of rest, we're in a great place at that time and we start worshiping God. And in that service the worship was so powerful. The pastor gets up and he goes I'm not stopping this. He goes. There's no way I'll be preaching today. And he just went for it. You know what I mean.

Joel Silver: 7:42

And and I sat down and we got to sit right on the front row, right, right in the glory zone, the splash zone. I sat down and God poured rest all over me. I've never felt peace like that ever. And what came to my mind was I've given you a restimony and I'm like a restimony, okay.

Joel Silver: 8:14

And the pastor, he's standing like right in front of me, like 10 feet away from me and he goes has anybody been healed of anything so far? And a few people like raise their hands and I raised my hand and he goes come up and share. And he had one of those mics that's like right here and I meant to whisper it into his ear but my mouth was right there on the mic and I said God just gave me a restimony and it poured through the, through the church. You know what I mean. And everybody's like all right. So he gave me this restimony in a time when I didn't need it. But the things that we get to look back on, the prophecies that we've had over our lives, there are tools in our chest for later. You know I needed that restimony for what was coming. It was a gift.

Thomas : 9:09

That's good.

Joel Silver: 9:10

Yeah, that's really good, yeah, yeah.

Thomas : 9:11

That's deep. Yeah, that's really good.

Trisha: 9:15

Yeah, that's really good.

Thomas : 9:19

Oh my gosh, I don't even know where to go.

Alex Silver: 9:22

We don't either. We're letting you guys drive.

Thomas : 9:24

Yeah, yeah.

Trisha: 9:26

I mean I'd love to hear some testimonies. I mean, I know, no restimonies, Well, no testimonies.

Thomas : 9:33

No restimonies.

Trisha: 9:33

Restimonies Well, I mean just of the people that you interviewed, because I know initially you said years back when you first had the vision of going out and traveling across the country, you were going to be ministering to the poor, into different people, and I'm sure you did a lot of that. But you were also getting people's restimonies, I guess, or testimonies, however you want to say it, from different people that you were putting on to your YouTube channel, and I would just love to hear if there was even just one interview that you did that just was profound, that really impacted you all.

Alex Silver: 10:10

Do you want to?

Joel Silver: 10:10

share. Well, there's quite a few you can, yeah.

Alex Silver: 10:13

Well, I'm actually going to share one that we have not published yet and this is where we had a little bit of a hiccup between us is because we do we typically like on the road, we do our recordings on our iPhone and we have a tripod set up and we had this beautiful, beautiful testimony unveiled and when we got back home to Montana I didn't realize that he accidentally deleted it off his phone.

Speaker 5: 10:39

So we need to go back and do a redo of this.

Alex Silver: 10:41

But when we were in Arizona we got a beautiful testimony of a woman, so it's actually, we got like both sides of the testimony and then we did like a third segment of them together, but it's essentially a woman that was given up for adoption and then so we got like her testimony and she's now a pastor, and then we got the testimony of her mother who gave her up for adoption, and then we got the testimony of them sitting together because they now actually live like a mile away from each other.

Alex Silver: 11:19

So they have this beautiful, beautiful story of reconciliation, reunion, healing. It's just a. It's a really powerful story and I am a little embarrassed and regretful that we don't have it on video. But I also feel very strongly inside that there's a reason that we don't have it yet to publish and I do have full intentions of going back down to Arizona and getting that from them. But that's for me one of the most memorable ones because it is so raw and authentic about hearing kind of like both ends of the, both perspectives of the story from the mother and the daughter. They didn't even reunite until what the daughter was in her fifties, I think. So I don't know if you want to share anything in addition to that one in particular, but Can I give a testimony of a healing?

Trisha: 12:15

Yeah.

Joel Silver: 12:16

So, as soon as God gave me the rest of money, this man, so the pastor, says if anybody needs healing, come up, and these that are here, that have already been healed, will pray and heal you, right. So this man, be lines right for me. He comes walking up in his eyes are like this big, and he knew, as he walked up towards me, he was getting healed. I could see it all over him and he so he's standing right there. There's another woman standing beside me and we asked him real quick what's going on? He goes I have plates in my neck, I have plates in my back, I have plates in my wrist, and so, okay. So I said can I put my hand on the back of your neck? Put my hand on the back of his neck, and I've never done this before, but I begin to sing in tongues.

Joel Silver: 13:10

As I'm singing in tongues, the man goes I'm hailed, I'm hailed, right. So the lady goes well, what can't you do? He goes I can't run. And she goes well, then run, and this man takes off running across the church. Awesome, right. Then he comes running back and then he bends over. He couldn't bend over, he couldn't do any of that. Just God healed, just like that. Yeah.

Joel Silver: 13:38

Have you ever sung in tongues while praying for somebody?

Trisha: 13:42

Wow, that's incredible yeah.

Joel Silver: 13:44

Yeah, it was awesome.

Thomas : 13:46

It was awesome. It's awesome and I mean, oh my gosh, just being like I don't know, I'm trying to think, I'm not trying to, I'm just the idea. Joel, what you said is like I've never done this before.

Thomas : 13:59

Yeah yeah, but you took, but it's just you took, you did it and you you let him, you let the thought, you let Holy Spirit work through you. Yeah, you did it, like I think that I don't know. There's a lot of people that are stuck. They're stuck in their ways, they're stuck in routines and habits, and situations don't change if we're not willing to take a step.

Alex Silver: 14:30

Yeah, yeah, we actually a few weeks ago just did a video on our channel with a conversation between Joel and I just around comfort and you know the comfort of the father and how beautiful that is and we can rest in his comfort. But we're also called to come out of our comfort zone, right, and he didn't ask us to be complacent or idle, and what that looks like for different people is going to be different. Right, it's like the facets of the diamonds, like not everyone is going to have the same walk and that is that's. That's probably one of the most beautiful things is our walk is going to be different than maybe our best friends, you know, and it's going to. It's going to look different, it's going to morph different, it's going to be different. It's going to look different. It's going to look different. It's going to look different and I think it's beautiful is that's why I call it the facets of a diamond is like you have all these different little cyclones of energy going around, going around the world to spread the good news of Christ, and it isn't cookie cutter.

Alex Silver: 15:38

So I love that it's. It's exciting. It's sometimes nerve wracking Because they bless me up with the world. It's fun to play with them for no reason.

Speaker 5: 15:52

So ti credit, so I where I come from is based on old university butter?

Joel Silver: 16:00

who gives me back to grow? Yeah.

Trisha: 16:05

Yeah, and I'm also hearing that childlike faith where we come to the kingdom, we can, when we approach the kingdom with that childlike faith and that trust in him and hearing the Holy Spirit like it's not gonna. Like you said, it's not a cookie cutter, it's not gonna be the same way all the way. You know every time.

Trisha: 16:27

And but when, like you did, in that, when you were praying for that person, it's like the Holy Spirit just led you to start praying in tongues and because you were obedient and you didn't question it, and it's just like, okay, I'm gonna do this and I, and then he got healed. Yeah.

Alex Silver: 16:45

And yeah. Yeah. And I would say to just another comment, Thomas, what you shared is one of the scriptures that I feel like had was spoken over. Joel and I was from Matthew 11, 12. I don't know if you want to read it, but I did touch upon it earlier.

Joel Silver: 17:03

But okay, and from the days of John the Baptist until until now, the kingdom of heaven suffered violence and the violent take it by force, that is, taken it by forces seeking God and not accepting, wrestling, grabbing hold. You know, when we first got saved, we fasted a lot. I mean, we were very intentional and seeking, and sometimes people will say, well, I fasted and nothing happened. Something happened. Something happened, seeds were planted. You know, yeah, just going for it, man, you got to so.

Alex Silver: 17:44

Well, so I can, I just add a comment, so like.

Alex Silver: 17:47

So I kind of look at it and this maybe is not the best analogy, but I kind of look at it as like an athlete, right? So an athlete that wants to strive towards a competition or or some other goal, that they have to be like the best of their specific trade, sport. They don't just wake up and they're like, oh, I think it's going to happen for me. No, like they condition their body, they you know what they eat, like there's all these facets that go into. They have a goal and they they seek it with intentionality.

Alex Silver: 18:20

They want if they want to go to the Olympics, they got to train hard for that. Does that mean that that training is going to be easy and they're not going to experience any setbacks? Nope, Nope. I mean, we hear power stories all the time where they broke a limb in the middle of their training and maybe they can't attain reaching the Olympics for another four years. So I mean, but that's kind of how I see. See, it is like it's there to for us to seize.

Alex Silver: 18:44

You know God isn't like I'm just going to dump it all out on you and you don't have to do anything. No, he's. He's inviting us in. Take advantage of that. He has set a banquet before us.

Joel Silver: 18:55

Yeah.

Alex Silver: 18:56

So yes, so we, you know we if we want it.

Alex Silver: 19:04

we, if we want it, we have to put some effort into it. It doesn't mean it's going to be easy, but he gives us this beautiful, this beautiful like roadmap to get it. You know, and it's definitely not going to be how we think it should happen. There's only one perfect one, and that's him. If we were all perfect, there'd be no room for Christ, right? Yeah Well, he isn't calling us to be perfect, he's calling us into excellence and he's calling us into a walk. I'm done.

Thomas : 19:40

I mean, where's the mic? Drop the mic, oh my gosh. So much here. I mean, I think, that the idea of intentionality I just want to come back to that because and I'm just getting the words do the hard things. You know, I think sometimes we want life to be easy and we do have to be willing to go through the fire sometimes and really do the hard things. And we can't fail, because that's the promise that we've been given is that his word does not return void.

Alex Silver: 20:14

So I just think that there's something there. Isn't that such a relief? Like we already know that there's victory, we know his words don't return void, so isn't that such a relief? I mean that should be a relief to us.

Thomas : 20:28

Yeah, little things can yield such huge results you know when we're consistent and persistent in the efforts. I just have I'm getting an encouraging word, or maybe a stern advice for the listeners Don't leave your relationship to chance, like that's a seed right there.

Thomas : 20:52

Do not leave it to chance. A lot of relationships can get tossed by the winds and the storms and the seas, but don't leave it to chance. Be intentional about the relationship that you want, that you're going after and that you want to cultivate and see in your marriage and in your relationships. Don't leave it to chance. I think the other thing that I would say is don't lean on your own understanding. You know, the one who knows us knows everything we need and, like you said, alex, the blueprint, the path has been laid before us. It's our job to trust, have faith and walk in it, knowing that we can't always see what's in front, but we know that we have promises and assurances that it's going to go well, that the journey will be well, and I think, joel, like I'm just oh gosh, the word.

Thomas : 21:49

So I just heard the Lord talk about forgiveness, because forgiveness is such an important part of walking together. We make mistakes, intentionally sometimes, but mostly, hopefully, unintentionally that might offend or hurt the one that we love second most. Right, because we love the father the most. So I love you second most. So I guess I'd just love to, if there's any wisdom you have to share, anything around forgiveness and grace. Those are the two words I just got.

Thomas : 22:28

And I don't know if there's in something there that you have to share, but I was just getting forgiveness and grace Forgive quick.

Joel Silver: 22:36

Forgive quick, for sure, forgive quick, that is. That is, that's a big one, forgive quick.

Alex Silver: 22:47

Yeah, we actually. So we're coming up on our fifth year anniversary, so we were thinking we came up with five things that we have learned the hard way, the hard way in our marriage. So, if you're okay, I'll, I'll share, yeah, five things. Okay.

Alex Silver: 23:06

So, at the top of the list, ironically, is forgive quickly, and there's all sorts of scripture throughout the Bible. If someone wants one to narrow in on Matthew 6, 14, you know, talks about forgiving others, as we are forgiven by the father. Right, it's even an integral part of the Lord's prayer as well. So forgive quickly is probably the number one on our list. Number two is the power of words. Right, Words can either produce life or they can produce death, and God set the example for us that our words should be producing life. I mean, he set the example by initiating creation. He, his words, created life.

Alex Silver: 23:56

The third I would say is in this one's. This one's a little bit hard, but the best way for me to say it is like if the grass is greener on the other side of the fence, it probably means you're not watering your own right. And what we've learned, struggled, we're still muscling through it is we have to take the time to service our own marriage. You can go out and be a powerhouse out in the world, but privately, behind closed doors, you still need to be intentional about sewing into your own marriage. Right, when you have a car, you get an oil change in it because you still want that car to run successfully and smoothly. Number four, I would say. Well, actually number four was this is what you had come up with is put your own oxygen mask on first right. Build yourself up in the word. What you had said was us as a couple were only as strong as the weakest link.

Joel Silver: 25:01

Yeah, that was an understanding that I came up, that I, that I you know, to build her up is to make us stronger. Yeah. Right, and when she builds me up it makes us stronger Intentionality be intentional on your relationship. Yeah, right, water your lawn, you know, yeah. Yeah, all the work on your relationship. Yeah. Be intentional on making what you have better. Appreciate what you have. I mean, we don't I sometimes will not have the understanding of what you have and how beautiful, how much of a gift it is. Yeah.

Joel Silver: 25:38

You know we can, we can see, we can see the spec. That's on the beautiful thing and just focus on the spec when the reality of what, the gift that God has given you, I mean yeah work on it, work on it.

Alex Silver: 25:53

That's our and that bleeds into our fifth thing, which is just gratitude. Right, be thankful Not just what God has blessed you with, but you know, god gave me Joel and I've had to coach myself and remind myself over the years and my walk with Joel, as we've kind of figured out how to coexist and grow together, is I need to be thankful that God gave me Joel and we. Sometimes we treat our material items better than the gift that he has given us. Right? If I spend a lot of time shining the rims on the truck, getting it under a car wash because I want to look good, am I doing that for Joel, right? Am I? Am I thankful for what God has given me and am I treating him as a gift from God?

Joel Silver: 26:47

Philippians 4 says think on these things. Whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is true, whatever is just, whatever things have virtue, whatever things are of a good report. If we think on those things about our spouse, think on the things that are lovely, think on the things that are true. You know, if we think on those things about our spouse and not the things that irritate us, let's not focus on the things that irritate us. I mean the way she does that. Just, I'm just joking, it's true. If we think on the good things, highlight those good things, right. I mean that will cause us to forgive quickly when the ugly things rear their head. You know, it's not the ugly thing that I love about you, it's all the other things. It's all the other things.

Thomas : 27:37

Those are so good. I mean, those are, that's five seeds right there. Five, five seeds. I can't see that I got four of them, so you're going to help me fill them in.

Alex Silver: 27:47

So for the first one was forgive quickly the second is power of words. The third is if the grass is greener on the other side. The fourth is put on your own oxygen mask first. Right, You're only as good as the weakest link. And number five is just be thankful for gratitude.

Thomas : 28:07

I got to just say thank you.

Trisha: 28:08

Yeah, thank you guys, this has been awesome I love this. Thank you for listening to seeds for your marriage with hosts Trisha and Thomas Walker. We pray this episode has given you tips and tools on how to thrive in your marriage. Be sure to subscribe to this podcast and follow us on Facebook and Instagram at Trisha and Thomas.

Thomas : 28:28

We want to hear from you. Be sure to leave a review and let us know how we're doing. It's our desire that this podcast completely benefits you, so also, let us know future marriage topics that you would like to hear about.